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• You’re not alone. Many have left Wellspring Church and found hope, help and healing in new community. The process can be painful, but you don’t have to face it without support.

• Guard what God has entrusted to you. Avoid private meetings with church leaders, don’t share personal information, and set firm boundaries to keep your marriage and family safe.

• Start your new chapter. Seek out healthy communities, trusted counselors, and new friendships as you rediscover your faith and identity apart from control.

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You are not alone

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As you prepare to step away, it’s important to protect yourself emotionally, spiritually, and even legally. In our experience, Wellspring Church has a long history of using personal information and relationship dynamics to maintain control. Setting clear boundaries will help you leave safely and keep your marriage, family, and faith intact. The steps that follow come from our shared experiences, what we’ve learned through mistakes, heartbreak, and ultimately freedom. Take what’s helpful, pray for wisdom, and trust that God will guide you each step of the way.

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We encourage you to pray. We believe that the Holy Spirit will lead you to the resources you need as you begin this journey. Remember, there are many healthy, loving churches filled with believers who genuinely love and follow Christ. You will be welcomed by faithful Christians who walk with Jesus in truth and grace. Build new friendships and relationships with Christians outside this church.​

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Scripture consistently teaches that resisting the gentle prompting of the Holy Spirit carries real spiritual cost. When a person repeatedly ignores conviction, suppresses questions, or silences conscience in order to remain safe within a system, the heart can slowly grow calloused. This is not usually a sudden rebellion, but a gradual hardening - what Hebrews describes as becoming “hardened by the deceitfulness of sin” (Hebrews 3:13). Over time, what once felt troubling begins to feel normal, and what once stirred grief or compassion becomes easier to dismiss. This is not because the Spirit has stopped speaking, but because listening has become increasingly costly.

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For many who have left Wellspring, the decision to leave was not driven by rebellion or pride, but by an unwillingness to continue ignoring that inner witness. Leaving often came only after years of trying to reconcile conscience with compliance. Departure was not a rejection of God, but a response to Him. Scripture warns that hardening the heart happens when God’s voice is repeatedly set aside (Psalm 95:7–8), but it also offers hope: the same Spirit who convicts is the Spirit who restores. Attending to His voice - even when it leads away from familiar structures - is not disobedience. It is often the beginning of healing.

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Guard what God has entrusted to you

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In the experience of WellspringQ, meetings with church leadership to announce your decision to leave will not go well. You may enter the discussion in good faith. However, for both the leadership and many longtime members of this community, their influence, identity, and even livelihood are tied to maintaining this church’s foundational beliefs. Challenging those ideas threatens not just their doctrine and practice, but their entire world.

 

The author Upton Sinclair once wrote, “It is difficult to get a man to understand something when his salary depends upon his not understanding it.” While some church leaders and members may not be paid in the traditional sense, they have invested their lives into this system of thought. You are not simply questioning theology or behavior - you are confronting a framework that defines their purpose, their power, and their perceived spiritual position and reward.

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This is why conversations about “differences” rarely remain theological; they become personal, touching the very core of who these leaders believe themselves to be. Without true repentance on fundamental issues, that identity will not change. Before you engage further, prayerfully consider how much authority you want them to have in shaping your identity. God calls you to be formed by His Spirit, not by a system built on fear and control.

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Many of us experienced deeply hurtful parting words from this church. In closed-door meetings, some were told things like, “We hope you fail so you’ll see the need to come back to the truth,” or, “We pray you lose your job,” or even, “Why can’t you be more submissive like your brother or sister?” These moments were painful and disorienting.

 

You may feel the urge to confront or defend yourself, but we strongly encourage you to avoid further meetings or discussions with church leadership as you prepare to leave. Engaging directly rarely leads to understanding and often results in deeper hurt. It’s natural to want to make your case or find closure, but your energy is better spent protecting your peace, your marriage, and your faith as you move forward. The following points explain why this matters.

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1.  You owe them nothing. Period. They did not “birth” you spiritually; that work belongs to God alone through the Holy Spirit. Scripture is clear that being born again does not come through human authority, special formulas, or institutional control, but through God’s gracious action.

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The apostle Paul warned Titus about leaders who “profess to know God, but deny Him by their works” (Titus 1:16). He described such teachers as those who “upset whole families” by teaching things they ought not teach, especially those “of the circumcision” - a reference Paul also develops in Galatians to describe men who added requirements to the gospel and placed believers back under human control. The pattern is unmistakable: when leaders add to the gospel, they do not produce freedom, but fear; not healing, but division.

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This is precisely what has happened through the teachings introduced by Norman James and carried forward by those who oversee Wellspring today. By adding a human-mediated formula to being born again and then enforcing loyalty through practices like shunning - even toward believing and faithful Christians - they have denied, in practice, the grace they profess in words.

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A.W. Tozer, writing in Man: The Dwelling Place of God, addressed similar movements in his own day, including Oneness Pentecostalism and certain Latter Rain teachings. He wrote: “Not all that glitters is gold, nor is every spirit the Spirit of God. Beware of any man who … is preaching another gospel. You cannot help him, and he surely cannot help you.” These words remain sobering - and freeing. Leaders who preach another gospel do not stand between you and God. They do not hold your life, your future, or your place in God’s Kingdom. That belongs to Christ alone.

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2.  You are stepping into a physical environment they control. Like walking into a car dealership, you’re on their turf. The physical setup - the placement of chairs and tables, the lighting, even the distance to the door - is structured to keep you in a position of disadvantage. It may seem minor, but anyone familiar with high-pressure negotiation knows the importance of the physical environment.

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Be aware that Pennsylvania law prohibits non-consensual recording of private conversations. If you choose to meet with someone, do so in a neutral, public setting. Agree on the purpose and boundaries of the meeting in advance, and make it clear that you will not participate if uninvited attendees are present.​

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Do not agree to be recorded in any conversation. Do not sign away any rights or make any decisions under pressure from anyone. Step back from the table without losing what matters most. Give yourself at least six months of distance before making any important or major life decisions. Time and space will bring clarity, peace, and healing. 

 

3.  They likely have more experience in negotiation than you do. In our experience, they lean heavily on the classic 'good cop / bad cop' negotiation and interrogation tactic. One is your 'friend', the other your 'interrogator'. The goal is to make the target trust and cooperate with the good cop - who seems reasonable in contrast to the bad cop. This tactic exploits contrast and emotional manipulation. The bad cop creates stress and fear. The good cop provides relief, which feels like trust or alliance - even if both cops are on the same side. You can study how to defend against 'good cop / bad cop' if you wish, as you will likely need this information at some point in your journey.

 

This church leadership has conducted these conversations many times over years. There have been hundreds, perhaps thousands, in your position. They are practiced in debate and skilled at managing high-stakes interactions through a calculated mix of flattery, friendliness, confidence, persuasion, and pressure. Many were chosen and trained for these roles long ago. In the business world, these abilities suit a successful trial lawyer, but most people have not been trained for that kind of confrontation.

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Like seasoned attorneys, they know how to disarm you with words and guide the conversation toward their desired outcome. It’s a high-stakes negotiation, and unless you have real-world experience facing aggressive or strategic opponents, you are unlikely to come out ahead - and you don’t need to. In professional life, people are paid well to manage such pressure; in the Christian life, you are not called to bear pressure from those who have no right to place it on you. Your walk with Christ should lead to freedom, not fear.

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4. If you enter the meeting as a couple, your relationship may be tested. The leaders already know which spouse appears more loyal and who tends to take the lead in decisions. During the meeting, they will observe your interactions closely, watching for signs of hesitation, disagreement, or shifting loyalty - both individually and as a couple. If the husband seems more loyal to the church, the wife may be reminded to “submit.” If the wife appears more loyal, the husband may be told he has no right to question her faith. It’s a rigged game: heads they win, tails you lose. Maintaining influence over one spouse allows them to maintain control over both, because few couples want conflict or the threat of divorce.

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They may attempt to turn you against each other with probing questions like we experienced: “Billy, what do you think about what your wife just said about our leadership?” or “Susie, do you agree with your husband on that point?” The information they gather from your reactions serves their purposes, not yours. Many couples have found themselves saying things they regret in front of people who are intentionally manipulating the exchange. Keep your unity intact - save private discussions for your own home, and don’t give anyone else power over your marriage, which is holy before God.

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5.  Anything you say may be used against you. The leadership’s power depends on information, and they often seek it through your trust. They want you to confide, to argue, even to defend yourself - because your words can later be turned to their advantage. What you share in confidence may be repeated or reframed to others in ways that serve their narrative.

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Many have discovered too late that private conversations were later discussed with family members or shared from the leadership’s perspective. Before long, you find yourself on the defensive with loved ones, trying to explain what you believed was a private matter. Protect your words and your peace - what you say in those rooms can be used to maintain control.​

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Think back to the salacious stories you may have heard about those who left the church. That was no accident. In many cases, private, even deeply personal information was leaked to shape opinions and maintain loyalty. Such actions represent a profound breach of trust, considered serious ethical misconduct in churches, businesses, and professional counseling alike. Often, this information is withheld only as long as someone remains loyal; once that loyalty ends, it becomes public gossip. Protect what is private. Be discerning about what you share, and with whom - because once your information leaves your hands, it can easily be used against you.​​

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Be extremely careful with your private information. Pray for God’s protection, and do not surrender what is yours to guard. Experienced leaders understand the power of information. Good leaders use that knowledge to protect and support others. Bad leaders use it to manipulate and maintain control.

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Do not expect fair play when the chips are down - you may not receive it, even from people you love who choose to support this church. This becomes especially evident if you hold influence or visibility and your departure threatens to affect others. The greater your perceived value to church leadership, the more determined will be their efforts, and the efforts of the congregation, to retain you. Your presence, your resources, and the social credibility you bring are all seen as assets to protect.​

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For those that choose to separate from WellSpring Church, WellspringQ recommends a concise membership withdrawal notice be sent by email or physical mail, with a copy maintained for your records. A sample membership withdrawal letter can be found here. Even if you have been asked to leave or "disfellowshipped" from Wellspring Church, we strongly recommend that you still send a written letter acknowledging the separation. A brief, factual letter provides a clear record establishing your expectations regarding the handling of any private or personal information. Putting this in writing helps protect your privacy and ensures there is no misunderstanding about your consent.

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Start a New Chapter

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It is the recommendation of WellspringQ that upon exit, believers seek professional, but Christian counseling or therapy. Very few professionals have experience with cults, but they should be equipped to handle trauma, PTSD, and emotional abuse. Members who have grown up in the Wellspring environment often report that they have experienced such pain and loss that they find counseling useful to help process the grief and to rebuild identity.

 

It is important that people who have been habitually abused seek help to undo the effects of years of being told that only certain characteristics and qualities are acceptable in a man or woman of God. Rediscovering Christian identity as a person of value simply because they are made in the image of God, valued and loved for belonging to Him, is one of the most healing aspects of recovery.  

 

Many churches in the area have counseling resources. Again, it is important to seek professional counselors and therapists. Most pastors are not equipped to handle this level of care, and repeated attempts at pastoral counsel could be problematic for one’s faith journey.

 

Leaving Wellspring Church may feel like stepping into the unknown, but you are not walking alone. Many have taken this path before you and found peace, healing, and a deeper faith on the other side. The road ahead will take courage, but it will also bring freedom - the kind that allows you to love God and others without fear.

 

You are more than your history with any church. You are a person created in God’s image, loved and valued simply because you belong to Him. Hold fast to that truth as you rebuild your life, one step at a time.